One of the reason I used to love summer is that we could relax a little bit on the strict bedtime routine that the school year required. I didn’t sweat it as much if the kids were still un-showered and playing outside as dusk fell. When the school year returned, though, that laid back attitude did not fly. I was strict about bedtimes, and for a couple of reasons.
One, I was usually spent by the end of the day. I was ready for some R&R–or at the very least, less noise. Two, if my kids didn’t get enough sleep, they were bears to deal with the next day. They were whiney in the morning, and quick to tears by the evening. So, at the Butterfield house, bedtime became a pretty strict business. Getting them into that routine, however, wasn’t always easy. Life obligations occasionally got in the way, and there was nothing I could do about that.
If you are struggling to get back into a bedtime routine, here are some tips to help you get the kiddos all nestled into their beds, so that you can curl up with a book…or just sit and stare blankly at a wall in peace.
- About and hour or two before bedtime offer a final snack. Make sure that they know that this is the last call for the kitchen. That way, they can’t pull, “I’m huuunngry,” right as you tell them it’s time for bed.
- Decide on a bedtime. This is non-negotiable. It means you may have to say no to other activities. If 8 p.m. is bedtime, then make it a priority and avoid being out past 8 p.m. if at all possible.
- Create a bedtime routine. If baths are part of your nightly ritual, start them about 45 minutes BEFORE lights out. Bathe, brush teeth, read a book. Your child will start to associate the routine with bedtime, and eventually, their bodies will comply.
- If you have a child that is resistant to bedtimes, be firm, but don’t let them see you get riled up {waaaay easier said than done!}. If they keep getting out of bed, don’t say a word, simply gently guide them back into bed. The key is not to speak. They want attention–any will do. The less you give, the less fun staying awake becomes. You may have to escort them back to bed several times a night for several nights. If you remain firm, they WILL stay in bed…eventually.
- Rest assured that you are doing them a favor. Sleep is when their bodies regenerate. They need it for their health. By strictly enforcing bedtime, you are giving their health a priority. Plain and simple. Seriously, changing your mindset about it will totally change the mood of bedtime.
- For older kids, allow a little personal time in bed. Allow them to read for 15 minutes before lights out. Tell them what time you want lights out and then act as though you are giving them soooo much freedom by allowing them 15 minutes to unwind in bed. Older kids eat that stuff up.
- Go to bed yourself. Kids are watching–they know if YOU are making sleep a priority. If you have a strict bedtime for yourself, make sure to play up each morning how chipper and rested you feel. It may seem overdone, but little ones are creating habits, and a lot of times, they create their habits by watching you.
I know lots of you have great tips for getting your kids to bed on time…make sure to share the love in the comments below!
~Mavis
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Kathy says
When mine were little, their father worked 2nd shift 6 nights a week, so it was all up to me. I just did what my parents did: same sex kids bathed together until too old to do it, then each got personal “mommy” time with me, youngest first because his bedtime was 30 minutes earleir then his brother. Would set the older one with a craft or something while settling the younger one, until age 10, both were in bed no later then 8:30 on school nights. Middle school age, was taken to between 9-9:30, personal time as they wanted it. They both hated early bedtime but knew it was not going to change because Mom wanted to go to bed too. High school, they were on their own knowing they had to be up and out by 6:30 AM. Both would hit the sheets by 11, even if they worked and had homework. Never had a single problem at bedtime or getting up until they graduated and started college and working a paid job.
Mavis Butterfield says
Sounds like you had it down to a science!
Tina says
And sometimes routines have to change *sigh*.. my daughter started getting out of bed after she thought I was asleep just to watch movies. Then she was overtired and would wake up usually 4-5 a.m. and want to stay up for the day… So I switched things around and printed up a schedule for her. Pretty sure the new baby shook things up for her, so we try to stay flexible. It worked for awhile but we aren’t afraid to try something new!