Everyone knows what regifting is, right? When you take a gift you received, but maybe don’t want/need and give it to someone else as a gift. Right off the bat, I must admit, I do it on occasion ;).
I justify it not as a money saving thing, but as someone who occasionally gets disillusioned with the over-consumption of goods, why waste and go out and buy MORE, when a perfectly good option is right in front of you? Do you think I’m crazy here?
I usually set basic perimeters on my regifting, to keep things on the up and up:
- I NEVER regift in the same social circle of the person I received the gift from in the first place.
- I don’t regift USED items, only new, in the package items.
- I always rewrap–I mean, I’m not an animal, I know a gift should have a personal touch.
- I don’t regift just anything to anyone. I really try to make sure the gift fits the recipient.
As long as I follow those basic rules, I really don’t have a problem with it. It seems pragmatic to me. What do you think, is it tacky or no? Have you ever received a regifted item and known right away?
Did it offend you?
~Mavis
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Brenda says
I received a GIANT Santa head cookie jar from a friend who usually gives much more sofisticated gifts. I knew immediately that she did not by that for me and had regifed it. And I must say, I didn’t blame her for not wanting it! I donated it. Just couldn’t bring myself to try and pass that obnoxious thing on anyone else.
Ashley says
I think it’s fine as long as you’re careful. I get a lot of lotions and things like that for gifts, but I have sensitive skin so a lot of them go unused. I’ll put them in other people’s gift bags as an extra item.
Maggie White says
I’m regifting a few items to my sisters this year. I have a few items that I have received as gifts that I think that they would like more! However, they are more like stocking-stuffer items (a passport cover, trendy nail polish, stationary) that will accompany their big gift. I have also been known to pass on a bag of nice hand-me-downs to them, too!
Kristina Z says
Of course not, if it really is a great gift for the recipient. I’m with Ashley on this one. I have received lots of scented candles and soaps and lotions over the years, which I can’t enjoy because of allergies. These always get passed on to someone who I know will enjoy them. It’s so silly to even care whether someone regifts or not.
Madam Chow says
I agree with your rules. I’ve received things I new were regifted and it didn’t bother me.
Carol says
I am with all of you, regift with thoughtfulness. Happy Holidays!
Random Person Named Melissa says
There’s a running gag in my family. My dad gave my sister a vegtiable steamer about a decade back. She’s not a veggie person to say the least… that and she’s not that domestic and my Father knows this. He was basically being a smartass. Well the next year she gave it back to him. The next year he gave it back to her. It’s a yearly game of hot potato. It’s kinda like what people do with fruit cakes sometimes except my family actually eat those things.
As for it being tacky…..Well I do it all the time. It’s the thought behind the gift that’s important not the gift itself. I don’t do this with big things that the giver will notice gone though….
Jodie says
I sometimes regift and have been blessed by others regifting to me. 🙂
Jamie says
Why have a house full of useless to you stuff. Just because someone gave it to you with good intentions doesn’t mean you have to marry it for the rest of your life. (It took almost 10 years of marriage before I realized this. I still think of my small apartment with two closets of space I could have enjoyed If they were not packed with presents.) I would rather someone know I was thinking of them, and passed my gift on to someone who it would bless and save that money, than have it become junk to the person I gave it to and rot in the back of their closet. Regifting rules!
Brenda T says
This day and age people do things that we would not have done a few years ago. It just seems like anything goes. I was always taught that if you receive a gift, that it was given to you, not to someone else, and should not be passed on. In my group of friends and my family, it is not the right thing to do. I personally would not, simply because I would not want to take the chance of offending anyone .
Tammy says
The summer we got married (2000, a popular year to get married!) there were quite a few weddings among our peers. And we did a lot of regifting of wedding gifts that we got duplicates of and/or didn’t want. It was a way to attend the wedding and not have to buy a gift. I will admit, two of the things we regifted were not really our taste and we probably shouldn’t have regifted. LOL
Now, we get very few gifts. I can’t think of anything I’ve gotten in recent years that I didn’t want or appreciate. But if I got something, like – oh super scented soaps or something – I would not feel bad in the least passing it on to someone as a gift (following the “rules” your wrote above, of course!).
Kaia says
Sounds good to me! Why would you waste the time returning a gift that is useless to you, and possibly buy the same thing for someone that would like it?
KAte says
Tammy, Regifting duplicate wedding gifts is a great idea!
I’m totally all about regifting if the gift fits the recipient and it’s not used/grubby. Once something is yours it’s up to you what you do with it. I put a ton of effort into finding appropriate gifts for people,and I’m known as the best gifter in my family. Sometimes those awesome gifts are regifts. Throwing something out seems like such a waste, especially when you know someone that thing is perfect for. The things I regift the most often are things from my mother in law. She likes to give clothing and she gifts me things that are nowhere near my style, and often nowhere near my size. I always write a prompt thank you and then find someone that item will fit.
Juli Nimitz says
Kate — you couldn’t have said it better. I’m a great gifter /regifter, too. I often pass things along right away to someone I know with like them and use them. If it is appropriate, I tell them that this was given to me, but when I saw it, I thought of them and so I’m sharing.
I have never, ever regifted out of cheapness. If I didn’t think the recipient would benefit, I go get a gift I think they would like.
For things that aren’t my style and I don’t know of anyone who would like, I have a “charity/yard sale” staging area. I am a volunteer at an animal shelter with an annual yard sale, and I also give away lots of “gifts” to charity.
My home is uncluttered and so is my conscience. Once someone gives me a gift, it is mine to do as I please. Otherwise, it isn’t really a gift.
Juli
Heidi P says
I don’t have a problem with re-gifting as long as it isn’t something that nobody would want so you give it to get rid of it.
I don’t personally enjoy receiving gifts that I know someone got free with purchase. Last year I received a robe from a friend (about the 8th one she’s given me) that I know she got for free when she purchased her perfume. Not a big deal except she proceeded to tell me how she picked it out just for me. Argh!
Catherine says
To me, it depends on the motivation behind regifting. We just had a bottle of wine sent to us by one of my husband’s clients. It is a really nice wine, but neither of us drinks wine. My MIL is a wine-aholic ;). It makes sense to me to include it in her gift basket rather than toss it.
But if I got something that I thought was lame or low quality and gave that to someone because I was too cheap to buy them a gift, that’s not cool.
Judy says
CARDINAL RULE OF RE-GIFTING – make sure you open and inspect your gift before RE-gifting it. EXAMPLE-a manager where I work got a box of chocolates from one of our vendors. She re wrapped it and gave it to a co-worker. What she hadn’t noticed was the personal message taped to the bottom of the box of chocolates. Feeling were hurt. This unforgetable story is permanently etched in my gift giving mind.
Jill says
I give away things that I can’t use on freecycle.org and then pick up things that I can use. It is great!
Ellen in Clackamas says
I’m totally with you, Mavis. I would rather re-gift something I know another person would like than through away. Some folks apparently don’t always follow the rules though…a friend of mine recieved a “gift basket” of lotions and soaps and one of the jars of creams had been opened and used! Big ‘ole huck of cream missing from the middle…ugh!!!!
Stacey says
I’m completely with you, Mavis. Why waste things that you can’t use but someone else would enjoy? I wouldn’t mind receiving regifted items at all.
Alona says
After years of keeping everything anyone ever gave us, we decided we really don’t need or want anymore stuff. We told all of our close friends and extended family that we didn’t want to exchange gifts anymore. Not because we didn’t love what they gave us, but because we have more than enough things. Our friends and extended family were relieved! For the kids, we have the youngest in the family, we can’t avoid gift giving, so we’ve asked for things that are practical, that the kids would love, and that weren’t at all expensive. We also welcome used or regifted toys. Every toy we receive, we have the kids put a bundle of old toys to either donate (if they’re gently used) or throw away.
I personally don’t think regifting is tacky at all. I think buying someone a gift and putting no thought into it at all is tacky. If you buy, or regift, it should be done with thought and love or why bother.
Kamiko says
LOLz! My mother-in-love buys a ton of bargain basement stuff, and gets a ton of stuff through her job. she gathers all the stuff she doesnt want, and makes goodie bags for me and my hubby! I love them to death! im allergic to lotions, but hubby loves them and he primps baby, Hes also softer than a baby’s hind end! i love the blankets, house slippers, towels, and other items that are your leftovers you dont want. i got kitchen supplies i really need. a cute set of bamboo whatever i used as soap holders! last Christmas she gave me a goodie bag of items that had animal fur patterns, and when i got home from her house, my kittens stole my zebra print blankie! never got to use it!
I am the person who doesnt like jewelry or stuff like that, but a bag of leftover regifted items makes me giggle like a schoolgirl!
Deborah Herman says
Sometimes you are given something out of an obligation rather then a desire to please someone you care about. These type of gifts can often be things you would never want or could use. I usually put these away and wait until I find someone who matches it perfectly. I put a lot of thought into making or buying gifts. I want the person to treasure the gift I’m giving. Not because it was so costly, but because it is something I know they will want.
Thoughtful gifts mean so much more then a bunch of junk picked up cheap that no one wants. Life is just too short to hang on to trash.
Deborah says
I don’t think there is a thing wrong with regifting. As long as the person receiving the gift likes it, wants it, or needs it. I’ve regifted and been regifted to. I love it! I do admit I prefer giving usable or consumable gifts, or home made ones. Receiving them too.
Marti says
To me regifting is just another way of sharing the bounty. I would much rather give the gift to someone who could use it, than let it collect dust on the shelf. My adult children are appreciative of the goodies that they find in their Christmas stockings–many are regifted or found at sales.
Curlans says
I was given a birthday present from a friend that had a wedding card inside of the box, to her son and daughter-in-law. Now that’s tacky! Plus her other friend just told me she’d helped her shop for it!
Linda says
I’m retired, and apparently the only gift many people can think of for someone who’s retired is lotion, or a throw blanket. I have been given enough lotion to fill a hot tub, and while I like some lotions, others make me break out, so I’d rather get them myself. And how many sofa throws can a person really use? They are nice gifts, and I for sure regift them using approximately the same rules you have. My daughter, bless her, always gives me a necklace. This was great when I was working fulltime and had to dress up, but I have a ton of jewelry I seldom wear, and I only have 1 neck! I know, I know, I sound ungrateful. I’m really not – I just can’t use what I get.
What do I want at this age? Amazon gift cards, gift cards to local restaurants, occasionally a fleece jacket, good novels on the best seller list so I don’t already have them, a subscription to a magazine I read, but most of all a lunch out with the giver, a visit, a hug, or help with some chore I can’t do alone- like moving a table, or laying a rug I bought. Print a little certificate – I promise, I’ll be thrilled! If you’ve got to give lotion, I use a LOT of Aspercream. HO HO HO
Juli Nimitz says
I totally get this. My friends keep trying to give me “things” but all I really want is time with them.
For those who feel that friendship isn’t enough and insist on giving me “some little thing” , I have requested kitty litter, or kitten food, or a donation to the animal shelter where I’ve volunteered for over 25 years. So far no on has given me kitty litter or kitten food. Two people made a donation to the animal shelter in my honor. The rest gave me knick-knacks that I thanked them for, and promptly put in the staging area for a charity yard sale.
Please believe people when they say what they really want. It probably isn’t fancy.
Cass says
“Please believe people when they say what they really want. It probably isn’t fancy.”
OMG how I sincerely wish people would believe me when I TELL them what I want. If they ask, of course. My Daughter in Law is a wonderful gift giver. My mom? Not so much. The BEST gifts I have gotten are the ones I asked for and/or was taken shopping to pick out for myself. Boots, wheel barrow, square shovel? I use them almost daily. Fancy sweater? Regifted to my fancy sister who LOVED it. (oh well, mom, you should know better by now, I am 60 years old and NEVER wore fancy stuff in my life) Sweet smelling lotion/soap? Regifted to a friend who is self conscious about her aging body’s odor. (and has said so aloud) Why don’t *I* want it (cuz I can stink too)? I am outdoors all summer and it attracts bees. Not my idea of a well thought out gift.
Give me a gift I ask for or fits into my version of my life or expect it to be re-gifted, regardless of how much you believe it’s the thought that matters. If it doesn’t fit my life, you didn’t think too hard and I have no qualms about regifting it or donating it to an organization that will put it to good use.
SilverReader says
Huh. I am solidly in the minority in this one. My friends and family do not re-gift, ever. A gift given to you was given -to- you. You can donate it (very, very rarely done), or throw it away (never done), but we would never give it as a gift to someone else. Our gifts are either handmade or bought specifically with that person in mind. The idea that a giver so misjudged what a person would like that they would give away the gift is rather baffling to be honest. That the giftee would then gift it to another is, well, somewhat insulting.
Maybe it’s just a cultural difference thing.
Elaine says
My (ex) mother in law was a notorious re-gifter and I hated it. I would put so much thought into a gift for her and I’d get a too-small red turtleneck or something that always went promptly into the good will bin. If I receive something I don’t want or like I will certainly “regift” it but not for any occasion, I’ll just pass it on and say, “I got this, but it doesn’t fit (whatever), I thought you’d like it” Then my friends receive something for no special reason and it usually makes their day!
Torry says
One year our daughter really, really, really wanted the Fisher-Price zoo set that was their new item that year. We tried to talk her out of it, because we thought she was a little too old for that toy. But she insisted, so we bought it for her. She played with it a few times and then was done with it. We packed it up and a couple of years later we asked my brother and his wife if they would like it to be their son’s gift. They knew our daughter had played with it. They knew that if we bought their son a new gift, we wouldn’t pay that much for the gift. They said they would love it for their son. Later my sister-in-law told me that she loved it that we thought of their son and that the gift was perfect for him! So yes I guess I did re-gift, but I was upfront about it.
Jess says
I have zero problems with regifting, so long as it isn’t just junk and obvious it was done. Honestly, some gifts are just basically because they gave us one and we feel obligated to give them one, but they would not be on our normal gift list. I did regift one thing I received this year, a small candle, that went to my husband’s aunt. She always gets us a cheap box of chocolates every year and we honestly don’t ever see her or even know what she would like. I don’t personally care if someone regifts something I have given them so long as they don’t do it in my face so I know about it.