Sign up for my newsletter and get a copy of my "28 Ways to Slash Your Grocery Budget"

One Hundred Dollars a Month

I am your typical housewife living in high maintenance suburbia. I have a handsome husband, 2 kids and a flock of pet chickens. I try and feed my family with $100 a month. With the help of coupons, gardening and bartering I am able to squeeze the most out of our grocery budget and still manage to have a little fun along the way.

The HOA House

The links in the post below may be affiliate links. Read the full disclosure
By on Ā· 113 Comments

Where do I begin?

How about the very first day.

I’d actually like to tell you about some things that happened a little sooner than that, but those little gems, I’m gonna save for the book I’m going to write someday. šŸ˜‰

So here we go.

We moved in on a Monday afternoon and after a few hours of unpacking, I took Lucy the puggle princess for a walk around the neighborhood. 5 minutes into the walk, I pass a lady {also walking her dog} and she says…. “I know you, you’re on Facebook.”

The very next day Chino the Handyman and his crew showed up and the remodel started. Within an hour a retired man walking his dog marched right up in to our driveway and began quizzing the workers. I had to stop him from coming in the house. A few hours later he was back, this time with the dog, his wife and another set of questions. What were we planning on doing with the place, who were these people working on the house, how long was the work truck going to be parked in the driveway, could he come inside and look around?

I donā€™t think he caught on that I was the actual homeowner for a few days because every time heā€™d come around and ask questions Iā€™d have this quizzical look on my face and really just sort of brush him off by saying I didnā€™t know, and that I had to get back to work.

There is a HUGE difference between a polite hey, welcome to theĀ neighborhoodĀ conversation, and intense interrogations. There is also this really cool thing called reading people’s body language. It’s not a hard skill to learn either. And yet, for some reason, I couldn’t step outside the house without running into this person. And it drove me bonkers.

Luckily though, the demolition stage of the remodel was over in just a few days so I could hole up inside.Ā And, because I can be a bit of a stalker myself, I quickly noticed this couple walked their dog in a particular pattern around the neighborhood. So, I just started taking Lucy for walks in the other direction. And that whole game of cat and mouse was soon over with.

Until I started my pruning phase.

I thought I was being super clever by pruning the 500 million rhododendrons on the property, but I was wrong. Every few days I’d go outside in the late afternoon {because there were less people outside at the time} and trim {to within 1″ of the ground} one of the many rhododendron plants. I’d then haul my least favorite shrub on the planet into the backyard, and cut it up into tiny bits before throwing the leaves in the back of my husband’s truck {below the top of the bed of course} when he got home from work so nobody would notice.

But someone {with nothing better to do, like I don’t know, cure cancer, feed the homeless, read a book to a second grader, clean up their own yard} ratted me out. And thusĀ the letters from the HOA started showing up in my mail box.

In case you forgot, this is a very large neighborhood with hundreds of homes in it. So someone, had some serious time on their hands if they noticed a little yard work being done. Then again, if you are walking the same loop around the neighborhood every single day, I’m sure you’d noticed if something was a little off if you were stalking someones house too {that, and the fact about 90% of the people in the neighborhood PAY someone else to do their yard work for them. So maybe a homeowner working in their own yard was a red flag?}. But noticing something like the removal of some seriously ugly plants is one thing. Reporting it to the snoopervising committee is something completely different.

The hashtags #GetARealLife and #MindYourOwnBusiness come to mind.

Soon after we put up a {5 foot} fence {because that was the highest we were allowed to build it}, the letters seemed to stop. Sure, I’d get the occasional person {who I didn’t know} walking by who would shout something to me from the road, while I was in the privacy of my fenced backyard but the letters stopped. So that was nice.

Now the only things I had to deal with when I dashed outside was the grandma who didn’t speak English but made it a point to stand directly behind me and shake her head in disappointment, when I pulled weeds. That annoyed the CRACKERS out of me. But stranger than that was a certain landscaper in the neighborhood who wanted to know where and when my husband worked, along with about 20 other million personal questions. Unlike grandma though, I was able to nip any further conversations with that guy in the bud. I simply gave him the evil eye and went inside the house. And then totally ignored him every.single.time. I passed by him again. He got the picture real quick that I wasn’t up for a game of 20 questions {that you shouldn’t be causally asking someone anyway}.

Again, I want to say, in general, I am not a rude person, but there is a HUGE difference between a polite conversation and being all up in someones business. Don’t get me wrong, there are some really nice people who live in this neighborhood {my neighbors with the black dog, The Church Lady, my 90 year old neighbors, the lady up the street with the old German Shepard, the lady who I’ve never talked to once because she is always on her phone but that has worn the same orange track pants and pink jacket every day she has walked by my house for the last three years. She totally gets a round of snaps for not giving a fig what people think of her outfit and not feeling the need to paint her face and put on $500 in workout clothes just to get her walk in by 8 am}.

Are you still here? Are you still reading this nonsense? Do you feel like you are sitting across from your nutty friend and she’s just venting and this really isn’t a blog your reading? You have no idea what this is exactly, but this crazy train, you’re on it. And just like Lauren from The Truman show you keep wondering…

Well you’re not the only one sista. Everyday I wake up and it’s like going to the carnival. I never know what prize I’m going to go home with or what shiny object is going to strike my fancy. Blah blah blah….

After the remodeling and garden projects were pretty much done, I got bored. Like real fast. Like, what do people do all day in their finished house, with their finished yard, when their kids don’t really need them anymore stage in their life? I’m not a shopper, I don’t hang out at the wine bar, get my hair or nails done, browse… for ANYTHING, lounge around watching soaps or reality tv… Other than walking my dog or the occasional hey, today looks like a great day to walk a marathon, I don’t really have a sport I spend my time doing….

SO WHAT? WHAT DO I DO NOW? I was pretty much walking in circles for a few months there untilĀ I started dyeing wool and rug hooking in earnest.

And then that just became a normal thing I did every day. Neeeeeext!

The days in my dull suburban life slowly passed, {actually, they crawled} and I stared at the walls, some days I’d even join Lucy at the big window and watch the people pass by {all ten million of them each hour}. I began to wonder if people living in other HOA’s got emails or messages like this in their neighborhood flyer boxes:

I don’t know what it’s like where you live… but yo, here in Stepford, we have 911 on speed dial. Because 2 people walking back from the store with a bag of pancake mix {with apparently a hole in it} just doesn’t make sense to us.

The clothing drive for cats though….Ā Seriously, I couldn’t make this stuff up, even if I tried.

And then, then there was that was the whole keeping chickens in your back yard thing. Which, I never told you about. I saved that one for when we officially sold the house.

It’s a good thing I like to keep things PG around here…. because otherwise, I wouldn’t be using thumbs to express my feelings about how I felt about that letter.

A few months later, we put the house up for sale, and got a better than full price offer the very next day. It just goes to show you, there’s a house {and neighborhood} out there for everyone.

Hey, Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY!!!! šŸ™‚ šŸ™‚ šŸ™‚ Go Get Em Tiger!

~Mavis

This post may contain affiliate links. These affiliate links help support this site. For more information, please see my disclosure policy. Thank you for supporting One Hundred Dollars a Month.

Hang out with Mavis & Lucy right in your Inbox!

Comments

  1. Oh my gosh! Get the bleep out of there as fast as you can! I will get the moving truck packed up for you! Seriously your neighbors are worse the Gladys!
    Soooo glad you are getting out of there! I have NEVER had to live with crud like that!

    Reply

  2. Wow… I could not have stayed there as long as you did! We have an hoa and seriously all they do is mow the lawn in the common areas, maintain the playgrounds and host a few parties like a summer BBQ and Easter egg hunt. It’s good you’re outta there, I don’t want to see you on the news when you go postal on those lunatics, attacking them with pancake batter.

    Reply

    • Lindsey-with all due respect-may I kindly ask you to please refrain from the offensive term “go postal”.
      I am a proud retired Postmaster and career manager with USPS-and these are real people-nice hard working people that don’t appreciate that term. I could go on and on providing statistics on work place violence and how the USPS are among the lowest, but I assume you meant no harm or ill will, and you really don’t realize that the term is so offensive. USPS employees are treasured members of each community that provide service, often among harsh conditions, dangerous areas and physically challenging.
      Just remember when using descriptive terms-that there are real people that are offended and use empathy. Thank you

      Reply

  3. Those people are seriously nuts! I hope you get out of Dodge ASAP.
    We have an HOA and all they do in maintain the post boxes, nag the county about patching the roads, and host an annual picnic. Nice people who mind their own business. I can’t wait to hear about the new house.

    Reply

  4. Oh, Mavis! I love you so much you won’t understand. I remember the plans you had to submit for the garden, and the changes so you could be lucky enough to push the wheelbarrow uphill. Am I remembering that correctly? Thank goodness you’re finally free.

    Reply

  5. It wasnā€™t the right neighborhood for you. Thatā€™s ok. Thereā€™s a neighborhood for everyone. You sold your home for over asking price. Part of that is due to the desirability of the neighborhood.

    I think youre going to be happier in a neighborhood without an HOA. I look forward to your next chapter.

    Reply

      • Lauralli,

        Your comment was uncalled for. I live in the same town as the ā€œButterfieldā€ family. The HOA that they moved into has been known for years to be rigid and all about homogenizing the neighborhood. As they had lived in the community for awhile they should have known. If you have to work in your yard covertly and hide the evidence, they knew. My husband wanted to move into that HOA about 20 years ago and I said NO WAY! Everyone ā€œoutsideā€ knows how it is in there. Some people want that and others donā€™t, if you donā€™t, then donā€™t buy in there.

        Reply

    • Actually real estate market is is super hot right now. My mom recently sold her house (not in an HOA) for 30K over asking price a few days after listing. Also Mavis did a lovely remodel which I’m sure increased the value too. I’m sure the neighborhood looks nice but if people knew how ridiculous this neighborhood really is I bet there would be fewer people buying in.

      Reply

      • I think youā€™re right about that! This HOA sounds utterly ridiculous and so persnickety toward Mavis in particular it seems to border on harassment – if she was as legally obnoxious as them she probably could have made a case to sue for some reason, like the HOA damaging her property values by spitefully denying her requests to improve her property – they really seem like once they found out she had a blog and (gasp) was calling them out for their bullying behavior on it, they were doing anything they could to push her out or make her want to leave – so sorry you had to deal with this for as long as you did Mavis!

        Reply

    • TS- way to be the voice of the snoopervising committe.

      911 for pancake batter? Cyberstalking? These are not behaviors of reasonable people.

      Reply

    • I would say it’s more likely that the HOA kept the selling price from being as high as it should have been. Word about abusive covenant enforcement gets around. No one wants to buy into that nightmare. I’m sorry the abusive HOA won’t be held to account.

      Reply

  6. Mavis, my four dogs and I are sitting here and we all have the same question: what happened to the chickens?!

    Reply

  7. That is bananas! Good luck to the new owners, I almost feel bad for them! The letter about pancake batter….. oh my word! Enjoyed this series!

    Reply

  8. I hear you on the nosy neighbors. We have no HOA, but our neighbors still seem to deem it appropriate to knock on the door and tell us not to plant things where we’ve planted them or otherwise pry into things that are none of their business. That’s mostly stopped, thank goodness, and we love our closest neighbors.

    Our house was an abandoned frame in an otherwise established neighborhood, so the yard keeps trying to revert to its original jungle state even though the house is finally done. We also both work full-time, in a neighborhood of retirees, so we don’t have as much time to preen the yard as others, and it’s all we can do to keep it mostly in order. If the neighbors were less nosy, I’d feel worse about that, but I really don’t care. And in exchange, we don’t care that one neighbor keeps goats and chickens. We even let their chickens visit (until they got aggressive).

    Reply

  10. I’m glad you are finished with all of that! I have had both bad neighbors in one house and a bad HOA in two others. I moved all three times. Some people need to get a life!

    Reply

  11. I have LOVED reading about all of your houses this week! Seriously like “tune in tomorrow for the riveting conclusion of Where will Mavis end up next?!?!” Type of thing lol. I have to tell you, your experience with the HOA people made me angry for you. I get the whole rules thing but they made it a point to add tone & attitude to each of those nasty-grams. What a bunch of cranky, hateful, cantankerous bunch of sandy, wet panties they are! It has DEFINITELY made up my mind to NEVER move into an HOA home. I can’t wait to hear about your new place, and the next chapter in the Mavis saga šŸ˜‰

    Reply

    • Natasha, you nailed it. OK, a place can have rules and they can even send letters every once in a while if someone’s not complying, but this HOA did everything with such incredible nastiness! So glad Mavis is leaving! I live in a place with no HOA, but the town next to me has a bunch of regulations and some obnoxious retirees with nothing but time on their hands. Among other things, they ride around every day looking for anyone who put their trash out too early in the day, which they then call in to “enforcement” to get a ticket written.

      Reply

  12. Oh my…did the chickens have to go away?! So sad for you and the Puggle Princess!!

    Oh the tyranny!!

    Reply

  13. That’s one serious HOA. You would think that when you pay all that money for the house and lot that you could do whatever you wanted to. I can’t wait for the story for the new house. I miss the gardening posts and can’t wait to read the blog this summer!

    Reply

  14. This is why I will never buy a home with an HOA. I live in the city limits and there are ordinances that cover the right amount of issues like no junk cars in front of your house, no dumping, no lawns over 3 feet, etc. I can keep up to 6 hens (no roosters) on my size lot (.18 acres – tiny I know!) and can landscape as I see fit.

    I think HOAs were made so people can tattle on their neighbors and remain anonymous. Grow up and have a real conversation with your neighbor if you don’t like something, when you are building a fence along their line, etc.

    Congrats on sticking it out for 3 years and on the sale of the house in hell! I can’t wait to read about your next adventure! I am hoping its to the east coast!

    Reply

  16. God bless you Mavis!! I also lived in HOA hell twice. NEVER AGAIN. Freedom RULES! If you need help getting out of dodge, your readers would no doubt show up for you and get that moving truck packed for you before you could blink. New starts are awesome. Big adventures… and I love adventure!!

    Reply

  18. Snort. I have to say, your struggles with that out of control HOA have been hilarious to the rest of us, but it must have been pretty frustrating to live them in real life. It strains the mind to think there are folks with nothing better to do than worry about investigating toxic bisquick trails through the neighborhood (probably couldn’t understand walking anywhere functional, like the grocery store.) Glad you’re finally outta there.

    Reply

      • They won’t think they’re psycho. They’ve convinced themselves they know better and everyone should be like them, after all the house sold quickly with a profit (throw nose in the air and “tsk”.). Goodbye Stepfords, hello Good old fashioned regular folks.

        Reply

  19. Wow! that letter about the chickens… just wow. I can see it; the president of the HOA is a well educated SAHM WITH NOTHING ELSE TO DO.
    Run Mavis. Run free

    Reply

    • I am a stay at home mom. I’d wager that the busy-bodies are affluent-ish ladies >65 years old. That demographic has challenged me the most in our neighborhoods.

      Reply

    • I’m an educated stay at home mom who is just grateful that our neighbors put up with all my crazy kids. I could give a hoot about anyone else’s property as long as it’s safe.

      Reply

  20. Oh my!! Words cannot explain the ridiculousness of the snoopervising committee…although I would’ve totally made some hand gestures from day one. What is wrong with people??? The white substance coming from the stroller though, that is priceless. Glad they wasted the fire departments day there. Thanks for sharing your life with us Mavis! Looking forward to hearing about your new house!

    Reply

  21. Can I just say – oh my god.

    I mean, you’ve made comments here and there about the HOA, but I never really QUITE understood how horrible it was – the nosy neighbors, the letters, oh boy.

    Glad you are free from that. My friends live in an HOA. One of them got the nasty gram for growing tomatoes in his front yard. Problem is, he didn’t grow them. He bought the house when it was built, and they just grew from whatever soil the builder threw in the yard. He had to pull them out! But not before I got enough tomatoes to make spaghetti sauce for canning!

    Reply

  22. Our city has an ordinance against rabbits and fowl within 100 feet of a neighbor (and no chicken tractors). I can easily get 100 feet away on 3 sides. But not the fourth….sort of. I found that I am pretty much 100 feet if I put them on my front patio/courtyard. šŸ™‚ So…we’ll be getting quail as soon as I level the dirt and lay pavers (quail are smaller, better for a smaller area). If they’d let me keep them in my huge back yard, no one would have ever been bothered. Now, everyone will be able to see them.
    Congrats on moving on to (hopefully) a much more private space! May it have projects (but not problems) galore!

    Reply

    • Be aware. One of the frustrating things about HOAs is that they can go and change the rules whenever it suits them.

      Reply

  24. OMG! It’s almost like a sitcom! So bizarre! Fortunately, our HOA is chill. We have chickens (never asked and there was nothing in the HOA covenants) and my neighbors are all cool with it. Ya, we did have to get approval to add a front porch and solar panels but it was no problem. Our neighbors know we’re wacky but overall midwest friendliness rules. Sure, the election and the divide over who was sporting which yard sign made for crazy times (and a lot less friendly waving) but we’ve all mostly made up. Folks get picky about where people park cars, where contractors park cars, and minor stuff but NOTHING like the crazy you have. That said, I’d never buy in a HOA again.

    Reply

  25. Good heavens, what a nightmare! Kudos to you for not telling anyone to f*** off and mind their own business. And if you did, completely understandable.

    Reply

    • I love this comment!! I think we are all thinking it! šŸ™‚ Have a great day!

      And Mavis – country living is the best living. šŸ™‚ No ordinances whatsoever! You seem like a person that belongs on a farm.

      Reply

  26. Iā€™m so happy youā€™re free! This neighborhood lost a very good person and neighbor. As evidenced from an earlier reply from someone who definitely is not reading your blog as a fan, your house did not sell so well because of the community itā€™s in. While Iā€™m sure that didnā€™t hurt, it was the amazing renovation & landscaping that brought in the extra cash.
    Youā€™re a saint to have endured the HOA bullies as long as you did. Peace out, fellow Girlscout!

    Reply

  29. Complete nutters, what a bunch of fricking people with way too much time on their hands. This post is the exact reason I will never buy a home with an hoa or live in a condo. Hubby had looked at a home in a hoa but I refused..don’t ever want to be told what kind of garbage can I must buy (seriously). I can’t wait to see where your next adventures take you. Plus, I truly hope those hoa f**(insert expletives) read this post in its entirety.

    Reply

  30. Jaw dropping. What unhealthy, black & white thinking, small-minded people and how sad their lives are if this is the focus.

    Will some strategically placed “gifts from Lucy” make their way onto the snooperivisors’ property when you leave?

    What strength and self-control you have shown Mavis. Kudos to you.

    Welcome to New England where there are very few HOAs, non-cookie-cutter houses are the majority… and clothing can be hung out to dry. Although there is the occasional house with a car graveyard out front.

    Reply

  31. They should be appreciative of you installing a nice wooden fence and updating your landscaping and house. Because your house sold for above asking, it will help the value of their homes and equity. Iā€™m sue their zestimate value went up because of your house. They should be thanking you and if anybody else with common sense lives in the neighborhood they should sell now and get out of there. The HOA will just pinpoint someone else and do the same to them. Iā€™m sure you arenā€™t the first or last to be investigated by them and sent cold-hearted passive aggressive letters. It is too bad they targeted you and used your successful blog against you. Perhaps they are jealous of your carefree spirit, determination, and personal achievements and motivation. Let the short man walk away with his tail between his legs, his big truck can only hide his inadequacies for so long. You are amazing!
    We just moved from an HOA in Georgia after 3 years and I am glad to not be kissing derriĆØre to the HOA President and the resf of the nosey group. We were in a rental house and got so many complaints and letters from the HOA. We constantly would refer them to the owner and property management, but it was annoying how the HOA retirees had nothing better to do all day every single day. We survived and they made no headway with the owner who thought she didnā€™t have to comply to the HOA if she didnā€™t pay her annual dues. The HOA filed several leins against the house and owner right after we left and 7 months later it sits vacant, run down, overgrown, and the property management dropped the owner.

    Reply

  32. If and when you get bored at your next home,
    could you please experiment and figure out how to make
    8 to 24 (or 36) piece puzzles for Alzheimer patients at Day Care Centers ?
    I think this is something you could figure out if it is do-able or not.
    If it is, could you please post instructions for how to make them?
    ( I’ve tried to make some, but there must be a better way of doing it. )
    The Alzheimer puzzles I see for sell are so expensive, and cheap puzzles
    at Dollar Tree are for young children and are too child-ish (cartoons etc.)
    They need puzzles with interesting pictures, big pieces, and be easy for old fingers
    to manipulate. I was looking at the Christmas bags at Dollar Tree, and thinking maybe some of them would make nice puzzles, (if only I knew how to make them).

    Reply

    • I’m not sure if this is an option, but sites like Jig Zone let you do puzzles online. You can pick the image and set the number of pieces. Otherwise, depending on how snugly you need the pieces to fit, you might be able to Mod Podge photos (perhaps of family?) or printouts onto craft foam or cardboard. After it dries, flip it over and draw puzzle lines. Cut on the lines.

      Reply

      • Thanks!
        I never thought of Mod Podging onto foam or cardboard.
        (I was hoping people would give suggestions.)
        I’ll look at that Jig Zone too.

        Reply

  33. While I disagree with you regarding the beauty of rhododendrons, I completely agree about HOAs. My question has always been why did you buy a house there to begin with? We thoroughly read through the HOA rules before signing on the line the one and only time we bought within an HOA. Never again!

    Reply

  34. We have an HOA (880 homes) which never did anything for 9 years. We now have a new board which didnā€™t want my neighbor to replace their roof which was literally blowing away, didnā€™t hold a neighbor accountable for ruining someone elseā€™s drainage, sent me a nasty letter because we didnā€™t mow our yard while we were away for spring break (funny I had big weeds they didnā€™t mention). They complain when people upgrade their property, but not when people break rules, we have learned in our neighborhood to NOT tell the HOA (submit plans for approval) because they will micromanage and break their own rules. Just do it!

    Also I have a great neighborhood and neighbors, they are the reason I havenā€™t moved. We all have a little busybody in us, but in a good way. If we see something suspicious we let each other know, or pretend to live at the neighbors house (there have been break ins in the area). We chat and bring each other treats, watch each otherā€™s kids, animals, gardens, when someone has to go to the hospital in the middle of the night we go over to help, we borrow tools, share recipes and cooking lessons, go on walks, lend prom dresses, and the kids play in the cul-de-sac. We also have large lots and fences šŸ˜‰

    What Iā€™ve been really confused about is why the HOA has been bothering you when you are improving your house? If the HOA wants to protect property values as the HOA commenters above have hinted at, who would want to stop you from investing and updating your property inside and out? I am always grateful when any of my neighbors renovate their house or landscaping. It helps my property value too!
    Your house sold above value, because you made great renovations!

    Reply

  35. Oh, bless your heart! I couldn’t do it! Most of the people dh works with live in little hoa’s, and wonder why we live in the “wrong” town. But living in the wrong town means we have 37 acres, and can have all kinds of animals….and privacy…and no one telling us what to do!!! We see the corner of one neighbor’s house, and IF we walk across the side yard, then across the pasture (with the donkeys), we can see part of the other neighbor’s house. Unfortunately, our house IS visible from the road, but not the back yard. Dh and ds go out back and water the grass or the trees whenever they want, lol!

    But then we spent many yrs in military housing with neighbors stacked on top of us (Dh would get, “I noticed you didn’t go home for lunch today….why not? Why didn’t you eat lunch with your wife?”…etc), then we bought a townhouse that felt a bit more private…and we had great neighbors…..but sometimes some neighbors wanted to visit more than we wanted to. We didn’t always want people knocking on our door….sometimes we just wanted to hole up and be alone, lol!

    Reply

  36. I have no experience with HOAs so I have to ask: Are these paid positions? I don’t get it. If not a paid position why would they be nasty just to be nasty? If they ARE a paid position I think “the power” had gone to their head. I will learn from YOUR experience and never live in an HOA situation. Good Luck in your new adventures.

    Reply

  37. We do not own in a neighborhood that is governed by an HOA. I did, for a whopping 9 months. Hated it, sold it, and now I have my chickens, bees, and a huge garden in a really nice anti-HOA neighborhood. I actually think it is dangerous to buy in a HOA governed neighborhood because of the power they are allowed to hold. The whole point of buying a house is to have the freedom to do what you want…. I am excited to see what is in store next.

    Reply

  38. I have enjoyed your blog for a few years now and am happy for you and your family. I wouldn’t have made it as long as you with the HOA. I can’t wait to see the new adventures.

    Reply

  39. Oh Dear! Run, Mavis, run! While I do live in an area restricted by an HOA, they (now) seem to realize that you catch more flies with honey. When we first moved in, our house was nearly derelict. We jokingly said that we bought some trees with a house under them. The interior was a complete gut job. At the time, the head of the committee was a little old white haired lady who drove a tiny red convertible. She knocked on my door one day while the dumpster was in the drive, and yet more garbage near the curb. Under the guise of the “welcoming committee”, she proceeded to inform me that garbage day was Wednesday. I informed her that we both still worked for a living and the only time we had to work on this POS was the weekend, so garbage would be going out on whenever until there was no more garbage. She asked if we could make it look better, and told me that when she had lots of trash she sometimes ‘TIES A BOW ON IT”. She has since gone on to the great development in the sky, and the old board has been replaced by more reasonable folks. In fact, they’re so easy to deal with now, we’re looking for another house in the same neighborhood. Never would have thought that 15 years ago.

    Best of the best in your new adventure, you deserve it.

    Reply

  41. This was clearly an abusive situation. Glad you’re out of it.

    My take: in situations like this, there is often one person in a position of power who is mentally ill, and the other people in the governing group are doormats who refuse to stand up to that person. They need to grow some backbone.

    Reply

  43. Holy cow Mavis! You poor thing! I think that a lot of people assume that they won’t have problems with an HOA because they know that they keep an attractive, well maintained house. Then they get surprised when they get “the letter” for some petty ridiculousness. Sorry you had to deal with that. Can’t wait for your next installment….

    Reply

  44. This is AWESOME! The HOA really fell down on the job here and should be ashamed of their shoddy work. A REAL homeowners association would have immediately called in the FBI instead of the fire department to investigate the heroin/anthrax/powdered sugar/Bisquick/corn starch/baby powder/cream of tartar/butt-buffing powder and then perform a full hazmat clean-up. I mean, your former neighborhood is practically a Superfund site now, so lives are at stake. I think we should all write to complain about their third-rate performance (and could we enclose rhododendron cuttings?).

    Reply

  45. Bet you didn’t realize you moved to help with that house. That HOA will probably be watching the new owners like a hawk.

    Reply

  46. I commend you for lasting 3 years in that place with those awful neighbors. To each their own … but I can say without a doubt that I would have ended up in jail after the first year and that first letter. Here’s to your new home — may it provide you privacy, so much joy, glorious gardens, neighbors who have hobbies that don’t include snooping on your home and who genuinely know how to be good neighbors, and all the things you have hoped for after 3 years in what I would conservatively refer to as “hell” … all of that to say — this is why I live in Alaska! Happy Next Chapter!!

    Reply

  47. You are a smart person.
    Why would you ever have
    Bought a house with a HOA?
    This one seems really extreme…but they all have
    The potential for making your life miserable.

    Reply

  48. Wow, no wonder you put the quote on your from Barbara Kingsolver. Hereā€™s hoping you fine a place that you can have peace of mind. I donā€™t like noisy people. I love that you want to write so no one is reading, just things from you, thereā€™s only one you and no one can take that away. You have a special talent that all of your followers know and love. Iā€™m so sorry you had a rough three years in that neighborhood. So less say 2018 is going to be great.

    Reply

  49. It’s been 3 years!? Time flies – okay well maybe not the past 3 years for you. But I’ve been following you since well before the Gnomes and of all the billions of blogs out there you are still my favorite! Yours is the only one I’ve consistently kept up with for so long and I think a lot of that has to do with your perspective on life and the way you take on challenges. I’ve always loved that the comments on all of your posts are usually filled with kindness, joking and encouraging one another – until the HOA came into your life. And although the commentors are not bicking or unkind to each other there is a definite undertone of angst and disgust (understandably so!) on all of the posts that had anything to do with the HOA.

    But it makes me wonder if said ex-neighbor recognized you from the Facebook then she must have been “following” you for some time to be able to recognize you out of context. And then it makes me wonder – why would she be so rude and interrogating to a blogger you follow?! Because I kind of would think you wouldn’t follow a blogger if you didn’t like them?

    And then I wonder – did you have a slight feeling like you had to warn the new buyers about their new neighbors? Ha! I guess you can only hope at this point that they fit the crazy HOA mold.

    I applaud you for the way you mature way you handled the situation and left enough mystery that none of us would know which HOA to go tee-pee.

    It’s the hardest times that make us grow the most. I’m glad you found your way out of the Twilight Zone and back into the land of freedom. I can’t wait to see what 2018 brings you!

    Reply

  50. My husband had a medical practice in a town with snooty HOAs. His patients would jokingly say, “When are you going to move here in town, Doc?” He would laugh and say, “Where I live I don’t have an HOA, and don’t want one!”
    You know how many people would see him and were treated for anxiety/depression bc of HOA b.s.?! One patient spent $10,000 on a new pavered driveway and was ordered to redo it bc the color of the pavers was not on the approved color list!

    Reply

  51. I could never live in a HOA! Too restrictive to me. If I want to cut down plants in MY yard, Iā€™m gonna do it. How did you stand it as long as you did?

    Reply

  52. Oh Mavis, my heart hurts so bad for the experiences you have had to go through. I seriously had to stop reading your story partway through and take a break. Some of it hit a little close to home, reminding me of previous experiences with a past home, but nothing of the caliber that you have been through. What nasty, horrible, and bored people to have put you through that level of emotional abuse over those past 3 years and to basically make you feel like a prisoner in your own home as you couldn’t do anything outside without someone watching and criticizing. I am glad you are able to get away and wish you nothing but the best in your new home! I look forward to reading about what the future will bring for you šŸ™‚

    Reply

  53. Oh my goodness….I feel like I live in yout neighborhood! This is my first rodeo with HOAs and man oh man…..First letter, which included a picture of the offending flower bed was that I had 5 stalks (leaves shoots, blades? ) of grass in my mulched flower bed. They were all attached to one root and about 3 inches tall. I needed to remove them, immediately! I can only imagine if they could see my container vegetable garden in the back šŸ™‚

    Reply

  54. What a terrible experience. It is great that you were able to sell and free yourself from crazy town.

    When you look back on the buying process of this HOA Home were there any signs (or red flags) that this HOA would be over the top?

    Reply

  55. I was guessing the chickens were an issue since you hadn’t mentioned them in forever. Hopefully your new home won’t have neighbors like Mrs. Kravitz from Bewitched! You keep saying you want to move to the east coast. I am in Pennsylvania and have traveled up and down the east coast. This side of the country is lovely and quite friendly! Keep on keeping on. Kuodos to you for being your own person!

    Reply

  56. I love you and Lucy and am so sorry you have had to live under their rule! I read all your posts and remember all of it. I’m so happy you are getting the hell out of Dodge and can’t wait for new adventures that I’m sure will delight. You are a much kinder, tolerant person than I could ever be in your situation. I wonder what kind of person can be the president of such a place? I guess it takes all kinds to make the world go round.

    Reply

  57. Dear Mavis, I’m very sorry you had to go through this but micro-managers are not limited to HOA communities. When our home burned down and was a total loss, one of our neighbors pestered the living crap out of us while we fought with the city and insurance company to even begin to re-build the house. Among her “recommendations” was to “build under-ground parking” on our lot to fix the parking problem on the front street. First of all, we had off-street parking and could never park in front of our own house. We weren’t the problem. A 10 unit apartment building was allowed to go condo without having the required 20 parking spaces (insert silver crossing palms here). Then she would complain to the city that we weren’t “building the new house fast enough”. She lives with her in-laws and knows nothing about building a home. I’m glad to hear you are out of there – did someone say you are moving to New England? I live in the Boston area and the Winters are just miserable and we have a very short growing season. Are you sure? šŸ™‚

    Reply

    • I want to reply to my own comment. I apologize for my grumpiness but I am not enjoying the blizzard we are having here in Greater Boston. Mavis, I am sure you will love living in New England and flourish here, as will your gardens, chickens and future bees(?).

      Reply

  58. I actually read the entire post even the letters. Kinda makes me laugh, kinda makes me want to vomit. You pick. Just too much time and not enough to do I guess.

    Reply

  59. Dear Mavis,

    I loved this installment of your blog! I laughed several times because I live in a neighborhood just like the one you describe! Fortunately, the original Architectural Committee members have either moved on or retired from the committee, but believe me when I say they were a bunch of nosy busy bodies! The committee is much more lax now and my husband recently volunteered to be the treasurer for our HOA. He also volunteered to scan all the papers being stored from the beginning to an HOA owned website. Having said that, we saw where the Architectural Committee walked the neighborhood several years ago and noted that we had too many weeds in our front yard! We laughed about it but I just couldn’t imagine getting a letter from the committee stating that we had too many weeds in our front yard. You see, our son had leukemia during that time and we let a lot of things that just weren’t important to the maintenance of our house go, People are just crazy!

    Reply

  61. We live in an HOA neighborhood because there was an HOA in every development that we looked at (for any house that would have good resale potential and a good school district) here in Coastal Georgia.
    We moved in April 2014 and my “Stalker” neighbor has been a PITA since the day we moved in.
    She has walked through my back gate uninvited to see what we are doing, has walked into my garage and rummaged through our things, walked into my garage and then into the door to my house and the best one — walked into my back door one morning with a half a toasted bagel on a plate, a cup of coffee and her two unruly girls ages 4 and 8. I want to leave so badly I can’t begin to explain.
    We have put an inside latch on our gate, planted a huge bed of shrubbery and flowers on the side between our house and the “Stalker, and planted tall shrubs down the fence line on the line between our two homes. This has slowed her down somewhat as I have a chance to get into my vehicle and lock the door and back out of our driveway so she can’t spot me.
    NO ONE deserves a CRAPPITY CRAP NEIGHBOR or HOA!
    Do what you have to do Mavis, life is simply too short!!

    Reply

    • That would be trespassing for sure – I would have threatened to call the cops. But I’m like that when someone crosses the line…

      Reply

  62. I’ve lived in a rural area on acreage and had a neighbour with the same HOA mentality. He made our lives a living hell and we moved because of it. All to say- buy where your house is surrounded by trees and lots of privacy so neighbours can’t see what your doing, or buy in a neighbourhood that is known to be a friendly community! Nasty people can be found anywhere, just as friendly helpful people can. Just sayin’ !

    Reply

  64. All I can say is unbelievable! Anyone who thinks that this is okay is out of there mind. You are the owner, not some crazy neighbors. Get a life people, turn all that negative , waste of time and energy into something good in your community, seriously.

    Reply

  65. Un-Freakin-Believable. I have loved reading all the posts in this series, but this one made my blood boil. So happy for you, the HH, LucyPugglePrincess, and The Girl, to be getting out of the neighborhood from hell. Go Forth and Prosper! LynneinWI

    Reply

  66. We had neighbor’s like that, and we didn’t even have an HOA! We literally could do NOTHING right. Even though our home was one of the best in the neighborhood, everything we did was “wrong.” Thank GOD we are away from those nosy nut balls now. We Now have three acres of complete privacy! I had some PTSD reading through this remembering what a nightmare awful neighbors are. Blessings to you.

    Reply

  67. Mavis, I can’t tell you how many times I have wished I lived in a neighborhood with HOA’s because I live next door to the neighbor from HELL He has been a royal pain for 15 years. We have put in trees that are now about 30 feet tall just to hide his mess but that does not help with the loud radio playing rap and the swearing at his children. We cannot even be on our patio in the summer in peace. The neighbors on the other side of him also have major issues with him. Now that I read about your troubles with the HOA house, I think we should just buy a remote island up in the San Juans!

    Reply

  68. Don’t live in a HOA, just a small city in upstate NY. I’ve been served with a code enforcement letter stating that my front yard grass had to be cut. Now code was anything over 9 inches was out of code, and I delayed the first spring cutting of one section because I enjoyed the violets blooming in that small patch. It was NOT 9 inches tall.

    My adult son was out back, preparing to grill and while it got hot, was adjusting his compound bow. The police were called because a neighbor said it was a “dangerous” weapon. When the car pulled into our driveway, the cop was laughing so hard, he had problems getting out of the car.

    Our house property backs up to a town, and we also own that lot. Town rules are different than city. On the town lot, my adult son built a small outdoor grill. The town neighbors saw the flames from starting the grill, and called the city fire department. When the trucks arrived, the coals were starting to glow and the meat was on the grill. Only thing we could do was invite them to eat with us. State law does not allow outdoor burning, unless food is involved.

    So, yes a nosy spiteful HOA can make your life painful, but so can nosy spiteful neighbors.

    Reply

  69. Totally unbelievable and unacceptable. Our neighbourhood (and many others, Iā€™m sure) would be thrilled to have you and your chickens as neighbours! Best wishes for the new year and fresh start ahead!

    Reply

  70. Hi Mavis,

    I’ve been enjoying your blog. However, based on the latest posts, it looks like Big Brother is still watching you! I would hate to see the sale of your home fall through due to these posts. If I were the new buyer of your home, I would be running in the opposite direction right now. Please tell me that you have already closed on the sale!

    I have lived in New England my whole life and it is lovely here! We do have four seasons, including winter, and they are all gorgeous. There IS indeed a growing season here that allows for PLENTY of fruits and vegetables, so please don’t be scared off regarding that!

    I wish you and your family all the best with your move, and look forward to hearing about your adventures in your next chapter! 2018 will be fabulous, you wait and see!!!

    Reply

  71. Oy vey! What a toxic place to be. I’m sorry you had to go through this. The truth is, there are nosy, bossy, unhappy, spiteful, and mean people everywhere. It’s unfortunate that in this case they have a collective place to employ those tactics.

    I understand rules, and need to enforce them for the sake of home values. BUT. The changes you made were to the benefit of the home and neighborhood. It wasn’t like you were had a rusted out Chevy on cinderblocks proudly on display in the front yard.

    Most annoying to me would be the person that felt entitled to come over immediately and start snooping. My mother passed away last year and lived in a very small town in IA. When my brother and I arrived to go through her belongings, I swear there were no less than 9 people that were over that first day. Some were the kindest people ever that we then found out had been a tremendous help to our mother. Others…..well. One person in particular just walked in without being invited, started walking around the place, and picking up stuff asking how much money we wanted for it. I was BEYOND annoyed. Every stinking time I was down there he was over trying to nose through her belongings and ask me when I was going to start selling them. We wound up doing an estate sale, and I sold some stuff for less than $5 to strangers because I refused to consider a much higher offer from that ninny.

    Gah! You have served your time, learned a crazy valuable lesson, and will have your pup and chicks back at your new place. I can’t WAIT to hear about it!

    Reply

  72. Oh, my. I have no more words. When our daughter was buying a house in an HOA this summer I read every line of the documents before she made an offer. Her’s mostly does the snow removal, take care of the parks, etc. She isn’t allowed chickens, has to keep the outside house paint the same and get approval for front yard changes. The real estate agent suggested that our daughter get on the HOA board since she is level headed, but she is too busy with work.

    Reply

  73. That is a NIGHTMARE!!!! Shame on them… šŸ™ Our first home had a HOA (although it was not an extreme one, thankfully). Even so, I would just about have a panic attack every time I saw one of their letters arrive in the mail! And we were some of the most conscientious owners in the whole neighborhood!! Power trip. We built a home next WITHOUT a HOA and do not miss that aspect one bit!! Hope you enjoy your lovely new home. Hopefully we will get to hear more about it in the months to come. Thank you for your wonderful blog! It’s one of the only ones I read anymore šŸ™‚

    Reply

  74. I thought our HOA was psycho (we once gt a nastygram on our door because we changed some landscaping), but you have got us beat! Must be fun living in a neighborhood with a real life Gladys Kravitz-not.

    Reply

  75. HOLY COW, MAN! I’m so happy for you that you were able to blow that Popsicle stand and make a profit! That was the first question I asked when we bought our house 10 years ago, “Is there an HOA?”. My in-laws went through a similar situation and it was a NIGHTMARE. Love your blog!!! Thanks so much for sharing with us.

    Reply

  76. Thank you for your insightful story. Good grief!! You’ve been through craziness. Hope you love your new home!!!

    Reply

  77. Oh my. I live in the same town as you, or perhaps where you used to live? Not sure if you are still in the Harbor or not. BUT, I know alllllll about how persnickety it can be. I personally canā€™t live in an HOA community so we live in our little 1930ā€™s farmhouse instead. It suits us. I have Always enjoyed your blog and you have inspired me to be more engaged in my food garden. I look forward to following your journey to the east coast!

    Reply

  78. When we were looking for our first home to purchase, my dad warned me not to buy into an HOA with CC&R’s. I didn’t know what he was talking about, so when I asked why and he described to me what to expect in a place that had those rules, we made sure to tell our realtor don’t bother to take us to ANY home with them.

    My husband drives a work truck with a company logo on the door. He wouldn’t have been able to park in HIS OWN driveway! Not to mention, he wouldn’t be able to work on anything in that driveway or even wash our cars.

    Conformity is not for us, either.

    The house we are in now has chickens and cows and cats. We do all sort of loud and messy things and guess what? Our neighbors have goats and chickens and alpacas running all over their messy, run down place. Who cares.

    Wishing you much happiness in your new location! šŸ™‚

    P.S. My grandpa was like you. He moved from house to house fixing it up and landscaping the yard. He got bored and needed to move on. Keep your options open…sounds like fixing up and moving on may be your calling!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Mavis Butterfield Etsy